Recently a friend sent me a chain email that bemoaned our modern culture of incessant chatting even in the presence of company. Some of photos would be funny if what they depicted was not an unfortunate and severe decline in social etiquette. Some in this country (South Africa) have blamed this on the popularity of RIM’s Blackberry phones. I am afraid that is not the whole truth.
It is quite disconcerting how good old manners are being eroded by how we relate to cellphones or mobile telephones – whichever you prefer. To be fair the decline began long before the fruit-named gadget became all the rage. Let me illustrate, it has become acceptable that when you are sitting with someone and their phone rings they are permitted to interrupt your conversation and entertain the caller who is not present. The implication of this conduct is that the caller is given preference over you who has made time to meet the person who has now turned his/her back on you to entertain the absent caller. Don’t get me wrong I am not implying that when we are sitting with friends or family we should not answer our calls. I am however bemoaning the apparent lack of discretion.
What we are now seeing with the BBM craze is in effect an extension of the above conduct. The chatting addiction is fuelled by the fact that the chatter need not verbally interrupt the person who’s in their company. The effect is however the same and can be summarized as follows, ‘even though I’m physically with you I think my ‘friend’ is worthy of my time than you who is right here with me.’
I now understand why the cellphone voicemail system remains free because it possibly remains the most under-utilised of all cellular phone services. We go to all lengths to ensure that once our cellphone rings, we must answer. Typically thought is not given to the impact of doing so to those present. In times past people would ask to be excused prior to answering their phones in the midst of conversation with other people. I am however seeing this courtesy less and less.
I am certain there is much ground to be covered by sociologist here on the cause and motivation for such rapid decline in common courtesy. There is much to be learnt about what causes us to feel compelled to answer our phones even when it is neither compelling nor necessary to do so.
Is there anything that can be done to arrest the rot?
